Thursday, April 02, 2009

Miss Kitty Has A Name

It took us almost three weeks but we have settled on a name for the cat.

I have been calling her Miss Kitty. That has the effect of making a hideous country song play on endless loop through my mind. For those who are interested in acquiring the ear worm, go listen to "Should've Been A Cowboy" by Toby Keith. Don't say I didn't warm you.

Since she acts like a queen, graciously allowing me to let her in and out all day, I thought of Elizabeth but that didn't work. The whole family has to agree on a name.

When she wants her food in the morning, she has a raspy Janis Joplin/Melissa Etheridge type meow, but neither Janis nor Missy appealed.

She also eats like a pig, has gained at least two pounds, and she is black and white so I thought of Fats Domino. That didn't quite fit either.

My husband suggested Smudge since she has a mustache under her nose. However, pointing out the mustache made me think of the expression Dirty Sanchez. That term can be found on urban dictionary and you DON'T want to look it up. It's one of those things I stumbled on by mistake and wish I hadn't.

This morning we were cuddling in bed with the kids and the kitty kept jumping on the bed and then running down the hallway trying to communicate that we needed to get up and feed her RIGHT NOW darn it.

I suggested Seymour, after the plant in little shop of horrors that yells repeatedly, "Feed Me!"

Since she kept putting her butt in my husband's face, he suggested Seymour Butts, a Simpsons shout out.

I roared with laughter. Seymour Butts it was. But my husband thought since she was a female, we had to put a girly name in there.

And now, without further ado, allow me to proudly introduce you to Jane Seymour Butts. None of the other cats in kindergarten will have the same name. I just know it.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

In Honor of April Fools Day

"DUDES! Who spread lube on my slip and sliiiiiiiide?"