True Confessions

There is something that I have never confessed on this blog. My family and friends know but it is not general knowledge that my almost three-year old is still breastfeeding. While this is not a big deal in other countries, people in the U.S. tend to find this quite disgusting.

I am, by no means, a lactation nazi, more like a weaning wimp. I am not anti-formula, just anti-screaming kid. All my kids have, in fact, had formula. I know many people who fed formula only and their kids are as smart as, if not smarter, than mine.

Things were not always this way for me.

My first child, J, took a pacifier. At the age of ten months, she decided she didn't want to breastfeed anymore. Her pacifier was much more convenient. Instead of giving her formula those last few months, I gave her (gasp) cow's milk.

Weaning was a piece of cake, I thought, until A came along. She didn't want a pacifier and refused to take one. She wanted her breasts and wasn't giving them up. She also talked extremely early so once in line at the store she said, "Mom I want booby time." It's moments like that when you really appreciate your children.

Finally, when she was three, I weaned her. She did not give up happily, but I could at least explain to her that she was too old.

Within a week of weaning, I conceived SJ, with my husband's help.

SJ is another booby baby . He loves to nurse. Efforts to thwart him are met with the stubborness of a mountain goat. He has his own word for the breasts. He calls them "bup." When he wants to nurse, he comes up and says, "bup." At least I won't get embarrassed at the checkout counter as long as I can keep him from rubbing on them in front of the clerk.

There are some advantages to breastfeeding this long. It isn't all bad. I am his security blanket, comfort when he gets hurt and a source of nutrition. He is also very rarely sick.

There are disadvantages also. He doesn't go to sleep without nursing if I'm around. He doesn't sleep through the night. My husband hates it and he wants "his" boobs back.

When SJ is nursing on one side, he likes to have his hand on the other side. I guess he is keeping his options open. This makes my husband crazy. He will come up and put his hand on the breast and push SJ's hand away. SJ tries, in turn, to push Dad's hand away. Meanwhile, I am the victim of this titty tug of war.

There is a book coming to me in the mail called "The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers" that I will be using to help him wean. It's the slow, gentle approach to weaning. It takes about a month. This is going to be a long sleep-deprived month. At the end of it, my husband at least, will be much happier. (I hope.)

Wish us luck.