Diet Disaster
Over the years, and with the addition of each additional child, my body has seen fit to get ever larger and more unsightly.
In March, I decided I could take it no more. I want to wear cute clothes. I want to wear jeans and breathe. I want to get dressed up and feel attractive, not feel like the circus rolled into town and loaned me the tent.
I'm down eight and a half pounds. woo hoo. At this rate, it will only take me another three to four years to not look like the "before" picture.
I haven't joined Weight Watchers, but do follow the points diet. I purchased the books and the calculator on Ebay. The reason I'm not joining Weight Watchers is because it costs money to get weighed and humilated weekly. That can be done at home, thank you very much.
The last time I followed this diet, I lost twenty-five pounds. Apparently, this time around, my metabolism has finally slowed to the pace of my children getting out the door when we are running late.
I do confess to not counting points on the weekends, but I did this last time also. All week long, I go to bed with my stomach grumbling. If I didn't have Saturday and Sunday to look forward to, I might just jump off a cliff. If California has a quake, it's just me hitting the ground.
I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. The doctor took away my Paxil. How am I supposed to regulate my moods if I can't eat chocolate? How the hell do skinny people do it?
And why is it so easy for men to lose weight? They give up potato chips for a week, take a ten pound crap on Saturday, and voila, they're a size smaller. We have to bear the children, clean the house and be the fat ones! WTH?
And why don't fat free hot dogs ever go on sale at the grocery store? Why am I paying five bucks a pound for processed buttholes and eyelids? Why does Diet Pepsi go on sale but Diet Pepsi Twist never does? Does it cost that much more to put in some freaking lemon?
Why doesn't the stuff that's good for you taste as good as the stuff that isn't? Why can't broccoli taste like cake?
Can you tell I'm FRUSTRATED!
I'm tired of weighing and measuring and reading labels. I'm tired of eating lean cuisine while my family has real dinners. I'm tired of smelling red meat and eating mushrooms. And why are mushrooms three to four bucks a pound? Aren't they just a fungus that grows in cowpies?
So here I am, cutting my calorie intake, and yet the number of chins I have continues to multiply. (Sigh.)
I give up. Would someone just pass the cheesecake please.
In March, I decided I could take it no more. I want to wear cute clothes. I want to wear jeans and breathe. I want to get dressed up and feel attractive, not feel like the circus rolled into town and loaned me the tent.
I'm down eight and a half pounds. woo hoo. At this rate, it will only take me another three to four years to not look like the "before" picture.
I haven't joined Weight Watchers, but do follow the points diet. I purchased the books and the calculator on Ebay. The reason I'm not joining Weight Watchers is because it costs money to get weighed and humilated weekly. That can be done at home, thank you very much.
The last time I followed this diet, I lost twenty-five pounds. Apparently, this time around, my metabolism has finally slowed to the pace of my children getting out the door when we are running late.
I do confess to not counting points on the weekends, but I did this last time also. All week long, I go to bed with my stomach grumbling. If I didn't have Saturday and Sunday to look forward to, I might just jump off a cliff. If California has a quake, it's just me hitting the ground.
I don't drink. I don't smoke. I don't do drugs. The doctor took away my Paxil. How am I supposed to regulate my moods if I can't eat chocolate? How the hell do skinny people do it?
And why is it so easy for men to lose weight? They give up potato chips for a week, take a ten pound crap on Saturday, and voila, they're a size smaller. We have to bear the children, clean the house and be the fat ones! WTH?
And why don't fat free hot dogs ever go on sale at the grocery store? Why am I paying five bucks a pound for processed buttholes and eyelids? Why does Diet Pepsi go on sale but Diet Pepsi Twist never does? Does it cost that much more to put in some freaking lemon?
Why doesn't the stuff that's good for you taste as good as the stuff that isn't? Why can't broccoli taste like cake?
Can you tell I'm FRUSTRATED!
I'm tired of weighing and measuring and reading labels. I'm tired of eating lean cuisine while my family has real dinners. I'm tired of smelling red meat and eating mushrooms. And why are mushrooms three to four bucks a pound? Aren't they just a fungus that grows in cowpies?
So here I am, cutting my calorie intake, and yet the number of chins I have continues to multiply. (Sigh.)
I give up. Would someone just pass the cheesecake please.
posted by Caro at 12:46 PM
3 Comments:
Join a theatre...
Haa Haa...
I am so busy with that I don't really have the time to eat...
I know that dieting sucks...You know the average american diet lasts 3 days?
I am trying to loose weight myself... and the keeping busy helps...but not enough...
Happy Dieting!
Techie
Don't look at Moi. 190 has always been my limit. If I stay at 170, I think I'm svelte. Of course, pictures prove otherwise. That's why I never let anyone take my pictures. Do you want my low-cal recipe for scalloped potatoes?
I weigh in at 183, at five-foot-nine. My prime fighting weight is 145 which I haven't seen since well before my first pregnancy. I have given up. I don't care anymore. My husband probably does but damn him, he still wears the same jeans he wore in college (and can almost breathe in them : ))When i got married, i weighed 110 pounds. of course i was working three jobs and living on coca cola. my onlypoint - if it makes you happy to lose some weight,it might worth torturing yourself for a bit. but if ultimately you don't care, relax and eat some chocolate, sweetie. I am sure you look fine and are being waaaay too hard on yourself.
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