Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Wacked Out Wednesday

A bit more info on the pseudophedrine medicine seems in order. I think that pseudophedrine is one of the necessary ingredients for making crank.

Most of the medicines that contain this ingredient are locked behind the pharmacy counter at Longs Drug. When I purchase any of these medicines, they scan my driver's license number.

So if I come back during the same month to buy more pseudophedrine-filled medicine, I am denied. Whole family got sick? Tough luck!

I don't know if I drive to Safeway, if they have the same information as Longs. My best bet would be no. In theory, I think I could buy a bottle at Longs and then one at Safeway.

Do the feds get the info from all the stores at the end of the month? Will they come to my door with guns drawn?

"Maam we have a report that you purchased three bottles of Nyquil this month. Step aside. We will need to search the premises."

Bastards, I'll just sick my dust bunnies on 'em.

I don't know if this is a national law or just more of California's fuckwittery. This shiny new adjective was borrowed from Badger Daddy's Bungay Blog.
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Yesterday I purchased a Woman's World Magazine. I didn't purchase if for the teaser line of "Lose a pound a day on The Da Vinci Code Diet!"

The Da Vinci code is a work of fiction, much like the idea of me going on a diet.

Another article was titled "How guacamole can boost your mood."

Everyone knows how to boost their mood with guacamole. Pour a bowl of chips. Mix some margaritas. Voila. Instant mood boost achieved.

Amazingly, they didn't have a picture of ass-fattening chocolate cake on the front. That's one thing I hate about women's magazines.

They usually put the diet and the cake on the front cover. It's like saying, "In case our diet doesn't work, you can always cook this cake and roll in it."
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This last part of the posting is for Sponge Bob fans. When the driving instructor showed up at our door last Sunday, I wanted to put a flashlight under my chin (like Mrs. Puffs handing out detention) and intone, "May God have mercy on your soul."

Not surprisingly, the driving instructor has gray hair.

16 Comments:

Blogger Bearette24 said...

"Fuckwit" is from Bridget Jones. That other blog is stealing! ;)

9:54 AM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Nah, all the FBI agents are sleeping. Didn't even need Nyquil.

10:18 AM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Good -

More Nyquil for me!

10:29 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

If your dust bunnies and my dog-hair bunnies got together, they could quite possibly kill everyone on the West coast.

11:02 AM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Sounds like a plan, Liz. But let me move first, okay?

11:06 AM  
Blogger nobody1001 said...

You know how about only 4 products, etc? Government always goes too far.

I thought they also used cleaning supplies to make dope. Are we going to be limited on those? What a great excuse not to clean!

12:01 PM  
Blogger Joke said...

In FL, each store has its own policy. (Most limit you to a couple of those bottles.)

Just wait until someone figures out how to make some narcotic out of vitamin D.

-J.

1:01 PM  
Blogger Ms.L said...

In BC they record your address if you buy in large volumes but then??? I have no clue what they do.
Governments scare me!

1:51 PM  
Anonymous Crazedmomof4 said...

I live on the border of Ohio & PA & I normally shop in Pa, which they limit how many products per visit that contains the crank making junk. But you can buy more then one per visit, plus I think you can make more then one visit & then there is other stores you can visit. So you can move your operation over here. Heeheehee

I know this because my mom was buying meds for my family & for her. She was getting stuff for me, The older kids, the baby at the time & herself. Since we all were different ages & needed different strengths or lived in different houses, she was buying about 4 or more things. Then again, who knows what she does in her "little Shed" marked "Granny Crank Shak?"

Did your daughter's teacher come back all puffed up? Maybe in an ambulance?Heeheehee. I regret the day my evil tween gets to that age. He'll probably try & play bumper cars.

7:01 PM  
Blogger Lori said...

Let me know I will smuggle you some nyquil across state lines.

My son is a huge Sponge Bob fan.

8:06 PM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

So the DVC diet is running away from a murderous albino monk?!

F-wit has been part of my vernacular from a very young age...it's quite common in Oz - we actually use a lot of similar curses to the UK...given the whole colonisation thing!

When I was home in 2001 for a visit, I wanted to load up on Sudafed (medicine with pseudoephedrine) to take back to Japan with me. The chemist wouldn't let me buy it. But when I got my Mum to come in with me, he let me buy 10 packets. So Carolyn, maybe you need to go shopping with your Mum :D

9:07 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Vernicious,

That would burn off some calories.

Lori,

Thanks

Crazed,

I didn't even think of that. Too funny.

8:34 AM  
Blogger BabelBabe said...

fuckwittery is a fabulous word.

1:17 PM  
Blogger badgerdaddy said...

There was no stealing from Bridget bloody Jones, I can assure you. The word fuckwit was around long before her.

And as for 'fuckwittery' - certainly not aware of stealing it from anywhere... It's all mine, dagnabbit!

If bearette weren't so damned cute in that pic, I might even be offended.

2:37 PM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

sorry, badgerdaddy ;)

3:45 AM  
Blogger badgerdaddy said...

You are forgiven, yogi.

1:09 AM  

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