Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Life Lessons

Being married is like working in customer service. Often you smile and nod when you'd much rather say, "Screw you very much."

And sometimes, when they're not looking, you pee in their coffee.
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We all hate going to the grocery store, I think.

Does anybody else get irritated with this?

Yesterday it was my turn to check out and the person in front of me, who was done, didn't get out of the way. She was standing there fiddling with her purse.

When it is my turn, I want to stand where I can swipe my ATM card and start entering my pin number. Maybe I start bagging my groceries.

But I can't do that if someone is IN MY SPOT.

Maybe I'm overly crabby, but I want people to conduct their business and get the heck out of my way. Yeah, I'm overly crabby.
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I've also given up on courtesy at my oldest daughter's high school.

There is a large circle where parents drop off their kids. You are supposed to pull to the right and drop your child off. Then you merge back into the left hand side and leave.

For two years I have followed this rule while other parents, whose time was far more important than mine, dropped thier kids off on the left.

On the first day of school, I dropped her on the right. I put on my signal to re-enter traffic.

Nobody would let me in.

Screw it. I'm dropping her on the left.

People still cut me off, but at least I'm in the flow of traffic instead of helplessly waiting for the one non-asshole among the sea of super assholes who will let me in.

Common courtesy is dead and I'm tired of feeling like the only one who practices it.

18 Comments:

Anonymous mad rabbit said...

People who work, and believe me you work, think that those rules don't apply to them. You do not set a good example when you follow the rules you just give them something to chuckle about. Screw em. "When in Rome"
The only difference between you & me (Re: the hubby thing) is that I smile sweetly and say "Screw you very much." After 43 years I know he cannot make it on his own. Hehehehehehehehe

12:38 PM  
Blogger Ms.L said...

Haaa, pee in his coffee!
I should do that...;p

I agree with ya,people are just so rude,and generally have a feeling of entitlement above all others.
Arseholes..

12:42 PM  
Blogger beadinggalinMS said...

It seems like people are getting more and more rude in everyway.
I get very tense grocery shopping cause of putting up with people and their rudeness.

1:06 PM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

"The one non-asshole among the sea of super-assholes"...lol. I had that experience yesterday. I was trying to get OUT of the subway and all these people kept coming IN (same turnstile). Finally some polite teenage boy let me go.

1:45 PM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

And yeah, i've met some real doozies at the supermarket. you have to fight tooth and nail in there just to stay alive ;)

1:46 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

You know what drives me insane in grocery stores? People who want to write a check, but they wait until everything has been scanned and the total has been announced and then, only then, do they pull out the checkbook and beginto slowly fill it out. During the mad after-work grocery store rush.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

2:07 PM  
Blogger Paula said...

I hate when your standing there getting ready to zip your atm card and the next person in line decides to stand rightnexttoyou. I say Pardon me could you give me some space. When what I want to say is Back off before I spit on you.

2:37 PM  
Blogger MsCellania said...

Oh, I cannot wait for the queue at school, she says sarcastically. Maybe I will volunteer - as the Insult-Spewing-Traffic Director.

"MOVE IT! Talk to your kids, later. RIGHT NOW, ASSHAT!"
"HEY YOU. DOUCHEBAG! GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND DRIVE!"

Then again, maybe not...

And the grocery store? Why do people think it's okay to hog the entire lane while they browse? When you say "Excuse me, please" they give you They Look, and kind of move their buggy a little, but not so that you can get by. So you repeat yourself and they make a Big. Production. Out. Of. It.Complete with sighs and snorts.
And then they skip an aisle and DO IT TO YOU AGAIN! Arghhhhhhh.

I think when the world is in alot of strife, people just are too upset to be kind.

It's, it's, it's

TERRORISM, I tell you! We'd all be better of never watching the news.

4:25 PM  
Blogger MsCellania said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Beadinggal - I was once waiting FOREVER behind a couple blocking the aisle and a lady laughingly accused me of being "too polite."

I'm a dinosaur.

6:50 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Bearette - I am always heartened when teens are polite.

Liz - Check writers. AAARRRGGGHHH.

PJ - Heh heh heh

Vickee - I wish you were traffic director at my daughter's school.

6:52 PM  
Blogger Cari said...

I've spent several years on the East Coast. When we moved to Minnesota, one of the things my husband and I couldn't get over was how nice everyone was..especially the cashiers at the grocery store. We used to joke that we were on a different planet. Although most of my family is there, I don't think I could ever move back to NJ. Not that it's perfect here, but I respect Minnesota Nice too much to move..at the moment.

9:24 PM  
Blogger Mary Poppins said...

::snaps fingers:: my ex never drank coffee!!

As for courtesy...I still practice it, but it drives me up a wall when I see people just completely wipe their asses with it!

7:20 AM  
Blogger Gingers Mom said...

I love your persepective on marriage. I hope your hubby finds you as funny as I do. Husband rarely do. I wish mine drank coffee.
The grocery store is a battle ground that I always come back from with war stories. Of course, my hubby makes me take at least one of my kids with me and the story usually involves them somehow.

8:46 AM  
Blogger nobody1001 said...

How about ther person who doesn't even fish out their checkbook until the groceries are all rung up? Then they write so slowly. You just know they have retired and grocery shopping is their hightlight of the day!

12:02 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

I am LMAO picturing Vickee yelling "ASSHAT!" at 15 minivans...

3:18 PM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Carolyn: No chance you could run over their children a couple times?

(Maybe this wouldn't be courteous, either. But it would make a point.)

6:03 PM  
Blogger BabelBabe said...

somedays I am just too freaking sick and tired to even piss in his coffee.

12:07 PM  

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