Thursday, September 28, 2006

It Ain't Easy Being Cheesy

Some weekends ago, my daughter, A, was invited to a Chuck E Cheese birthday party.

Ugh.

My husband and I both hate going in crowded public places. Yes, you can safely assume that my kids miss out on lots of things because I HATE crowds. But she wanted to go to the party, so I took her.

My husband got the unenviable task of staying home with the boy child. I took both my daughters to the party. My oldest daughter wanted me to buy her some pizza. She didn't actually attend the party.

It was in Sacramento. I went to mapquest and printed out directions. May I add here that mapquest sucks? I hope so, because I did.

We had to take an exit off the highway, drive up a few miles, then turn left and u-turn immediately into the parking lot.

Only I u-turned and there was no damn Chuck E Cheese. We were actually quite far from where we needed to be.

No problem. We were on the correct street. I merely needed to drive to the correct address. Ha ha ha.

We drove and drove. Suddenly we were at a freeway and we HAD to get in. At this point, I told my daughter we would probably miss the party. (I was under the impression it was a 45 minute party.)

She began sobbing. I saw an exit ahead for the street we needed to be on. We could go west or east. I chose west.

It soon became apparent I should have gone east. We landed in a neighborhood where I wouldn't want to go out after dark or during the daylight for that matter.

I flipped a u-turn and floored it. There was a pigeon in the road. He wasn't expecting me to be driving quite the speed I was. I couldn't stop. He flew up too late and managed to smash into the driver's side mirror.

Now we had killed a pigeon, we were lost and the mirror was hanging by a few wires. As I began rolling down the window to pull the mirror off, it flew away, into the middle of thick traffic.

"A" was crying and said, "This is the worst day of my life."

My older daughter said that she thought that the pigeon had a bit worse day.

Finally we found Chuck E Cheese. We were about 25 minutes late. It took another few minutes to find parking.

When we got inside, there was A LINE. There was a line to get into the pizza place from hell. It looked like a damn L.A. nightclub, complete with a guy at the front of the line who looked like a bouncer.

Since we were some of the beautiful people invited to a party, we got to go right in.

Do you ever feel like you died and went to hell? Yep, that's where we were.

It was crowded and noisy. Every surface was covered with a shrieking child. Shudder.

The party was actually and hour and a half long. My daughter had a great time.

When it was time to trade in the tickets for cheap plastic shit toys, I saw the line and said no.

She was smart enough not to protest.

Chuck E. Cheeses, where adults can go insane.

16 Comments:

Blogger Gingers Mom said...

Sadly enough...I like Chuck E Cheese. Probably because I go and set and eat pizza and make my husband take my kids to the games while I sit in peace. As peaceful as it gets at C.E.C. At least if it isnt my kid screaming I don't have to care.
I like your oldest's sense of humor. Just like her momma?
How old is A? I like her too. Drama queen just like mine.

7:56 PM  
Blogger Chelle said...

OMG I HATED Chuck E CHeese. I am sooo glad tht my kids are older and I dotn have to go there anymore....lol I, too, hate crowds and even moreso....crowds that involve a million screaming children. I LOVE kids...jsut not loud screaming ones....lol Oh well....at least you survived and hopefully you won't have to make a trip there for a LONG time...lol

You know..if they served BEER there, it would be a MUCH nicer spot for the parents!! hehe

9:59 PM  
Blogger CheerleadingTechie said...

Ohh... did I forget to tell you that the 2nd Anniversary of my 10th Birthday will be at Chuck E. Cheese...? Don't worry... I'll have my party on a weekday morning... hehehe....

10:46 PM  
Blogger Roxanne said...

The last time we were at C.E.C, while standing in one of the lines (one of the MANY lines), my hubby made the blank statement, "Chucky is Satan." Our son started laughing and hubby turned around only to see that Chucky was standing directly behind him with a confused look on his face (is this possible?). He said, "Sorry Chucky. Don't take it personal."

5:24 AM  
Blogger Bec of the Ladies Lounge said...

I count Australia the lucky country for so far escaping the hell that Chuck E Cheese conjuures. McDonalds, Hungry Jacks and KFC are bad enough...

Well done, just for living to tell the tale!

5:58 AM  
Blogger candy said...

My 6 year old has to go to a party at Chuck E. Cheese this Sunday I am so not looking forward to it. On the bright side I have to take him in, then drop him off, then come back two hours later and pick him up.

6:39 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

i have fond memories of chuck e. cheese...but i'm sure as an adult, the place wouldn't cut it. (sorry, i think there's an unintentional pun there somewhere.)

what a nightmarish trip :(

6:48 AM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Kristin - I have NEVER seen a Chuck E Cheese as crowded as that one. Some of the adults had to stand up and eat because there was no place to sit. Every game had a kid in front of it and two kids waiting. It was hard to even find your own kid, that is if you wanted to. A is 7. Yes, she is definitely filled with the drama. When she cries, it sounds like Lucy Ricardo.

Chelle - Ooh, the beer would be lovely. But then they could never get us to leave. :)

Techie - How have you been? Are you going to play in the ball pit on your birthday?

Roxanne - Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. That's great.

Bec - I've never heard of Hungry Jacks. But KFC and McDonald's are both tools of the devil designed to make our butts wider.

Candy - That's my favorite kind of birthday party, the drop and run.

Bearette - I liked the unintentional pun.

7:32 AM  
Blogger Velma said...

Hi Carolyn -

I'm replying via comments because I couldn't find an e-mail address for you on your site. Thanks for the word on the Red #40 - it's something we eliminate when possible (like the Motrin Cold medicine I gave him was the un-dyed version) but I haven't gotten myself in gear to totally eradicate (like he still eats pink Go-Gurts because he'd starve if he didn't.)

Chuck E. Cheese is always one of the highlights for my kids when we go visit Grandma & Grandpa. Thank God there isn't one closer to where we live!

8:45 AM  
Anonymous mad rabbit said...

Who in the world would plan a birthday party 45 minutes away from home hosted by a rat?? someone who did not want a lot of people to show up I'll bet....and oor you, no way to drop her off and come back later....Sounds like a wonderful party.

10:15 AM  
Blogger Ms.L said...

Ohhh that's my kind of hell too!
Did you ever stop to wonder if you were in the Twilight Zone like I often do?? Some days just don't seem like they could be real with all that goes wrong.

Hee,I love your daughter. Yep,poor pigeon,lol

11:56 AM  
Blogger Crazedmomof4 said...

Liked the oldest comment on the bird! Poor Pigeon. MapQuest is a pain. It likes to tell you there are roads where there are none. Why???
ChuckECheese isn't that bad here but I do believe you are right saying it is hell.
I hate crowds too!!!

9:16 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

You poor thing. I'm glad you made it in time.

Thoughts of Chuck E Cheese give me the trembles.

10:18 AM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

Hungry Jacks is Burger King in Australia.

Your tales of doom (AKA car trips) always make me laugh!

6:00 AM  
Blogger My float said...

sometimes i'm glad to live in a country where there is no chuck e cheese! that just sounds insane. any wonder you hate crowds.

2:12 AM  
Blogger Mary Poppins said...

I had to stop reading...too f*ckn' funny...Lord knows how I feel about Chuck E. Cheese and the lines and the bouncer and the way they tag your wrists at the entrance...the crowds, the kids, the bad pizza and the tickets for the cheap toys...

I agree with Chelle: they need alchohol. Then they'd beat Disney for the "happiest place on earth".

BTW...Poor Poor Pigeon...it was probably on it's way to a shingdig as well....

12:45 PM  

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