Thursday, November 30, 2006

Not Much to Post

So here I sit, having checked everybody's blog. I actually have time to post and I have nothing. Pooh!

I could talk about how utterly lovely my teen daughter is being lately.

She's at THAT stage. You know the one, the "we are out to get her and we treat her so shabbily" stage.

While I know I am not the perfect parent, I don't think I'm the worst in the world either. But she certainly does.

There are days I'm sure that aliens have visited and switched children with me.

I find it hard to believe that I got a fatter belly, saggy breasts and stretch marks only to have to put up with this crap.
We have not decorated yet or put up a tree. This is awful but I don't feel like digging out the decorations this year.

Every January I pack my ornaments up and put them in the storage shed. Every December I go out to get them and they are buried under a ton of $hit.

I am tired of digging them out. I'm tired of undecorating the tree. I'm tired of the whole thing.

I want one of those Adam Sandler remote controls so I can fast forward through this month.

Am I the only Scrooge out there? The rest of you seem so cheery!
Due to the stress of raising a teen and my Christmas angst, I am now mainlining chocolate. That's right. I heat it up in a spoon, load the syringe and put it straight in my veins.

Pity it flows straight to my belly.
But let's not end this "whiny as all get out" post on a sour note.

There are some good things going on too.

SJ has become a talking machine. When we go in the store, all decorated for the season, he points to all the decorations and asks, "What's that?"

Now he points to the trees and says, "Christmas tree."

This kid, who never answers questions, also surprised me in another way.

I said, "You like to open presents, don't you?"

And he laughed and replied, "yeah."

You could have knocked me over with a feather, well if I hadn't been mainlining chocolate you could have.


Blogger Bearette24 said...

yay! i'm glad he's talking.

8:17 PM  
Blogger Ms.L said...

YAY for SJ!
Look at him go,talking up a storm.
He I love his enthusiasum for presents,right on kid! lol
and of course yay for mainling chocolate.
You sound like you need it.
I say chocolate is VERY theraputic.
I'm feeling scroogey's so much work and it costs so much and ahhhhh,wake me in the Spring.
I've haven't gotten my tree up either. I'm thinking it'll go up the weekend before.

11:11 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Wow! That's wonderful about SJ. :)

7:39 AM  
Blogger beadinggalinMS said...

Very cool about SJ!! :)
I am soo happy you told me how to mailine chocolate. I bet all them left over chocolate cake icing containers I hide in the fridge is going to be perfect for mainlining!!

A couple years back I was Miss Scrooge. I am glad someone else feels the way I did that year. It can be a pain in the butt with decorating and all.

10:39 AM  
Blogger Gingers Mom said...

I am so happy for you...for SJ. That is a big accomplishment for him. I know you work really hard for him so you should be so proud.

You are a GENIUS with the whole mainlining chocolate thing. Here I am trying to diet through the most stressful time of the year. SCREW THAT. Somebody hand me a snickers and QUICK.

My Stinky is being just that. A screaming raging lunatic that is driving me nuts. Remember when we found out we were pregnant and couldn't wait to have somebody call us mom? We were so stupid.

11:41 AM  
Blogger Bec of the Ladies Lounge said...

I'm sorry - for some reason I'm well into the Bob Cratchitt side of the Christmas Carol this year! I normally hold out until three or four days before Xmas to do any decorations. This year we put the tree up on December 1, last night.


That said.

I do get it.

I saw a number of self-decorated trees in the shops this year. With optical fibre lights on the branches and permanently fixed baubles neatly arranged on the end of every branch.

And lordy, I was so tempted!

11:44 AM  
Blogger Lori said...

Hooray for SJ!

Sometimes being cheery at this time of the year is really a cover up for being a scrooge LOL.


3:23 PM  
Blogger Paula said...

Number one- You can't taste it if you mainline it.

Number two- You can't live with em', you can't kill em'. So put the chocolate in your mouth and enjoy it!

4:13 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Bearette - Thanks

Ms. L. - I wish it were theraputic and low-cal!

Thanks, Liz.

Beadinggal - My husband steals the chocolate frosting from the fridge before I can.

Gingersmom - The kids go through such lovely stages, don't they?

Bec - Those are some tempting trees. I wouldn't mind one.

Lori - Maybe I'll start trying to hide the scrooginess better.

Paula - Wiser words have never been spoken. I'm sure of it.

6:43 PM  
Anonymous mad rabbit said...

Obviously you have forgotten your Mantra
OOOOOOMMM Nobody loves a teenager but another teenager!!!!!!!!!!
Decorate for A & SJ. That will be reason enough to make you glad you did. He is really coming into his own and he won't get the whole christmas thing if you don't decorate.
I have started decorating myself, now if I could just keep the cat from undecorating the tree life would be good..

8:04 AM  
Blogger Chelle said...

I'm here to tell you that life with a teenager does, in fact, get better!! LOL I am proof! Hehe Wait until she is about 17 and then she will start to become human again. I think aliens come down and put a different personality into young girls, starting about age 5, and come back for it 12 years later. Cause from 5-12 I didnt' even know who my daughter was!! No way that biatchy thang came from MY body!! lol Trust day you WILL like her again....she WILL be nice!! lol

I hope you get Christmasy soon. I have had the blahs lately, so I kinda know what you mean....I think it's jus the time of year, the shitty weather, I dunno.

Yay for SJ and all that talking! That rocks :)

5:18 PM  
Blogger My float said...

Oh, please don't tell me it gets worse. I'm at my wit's end with Mr Almost-Three. I can't face him as a sullen teenager.

I was thinking the same thing when he threw a tantrum the other day. He was screeching and I was just in disbelief, thinking, "I went through CRAP for you and you're behaving like this?" Not to mention the leftover belly, and the overwhelming exhaustion, and the trips to the hospital (three and counting). For this ATTITUDE?

Sigh. Just as well they don't make crystal balls - the world population would be in crisis!

PS. It's great that SJ is talking. I couldn't wait for LC to talk. Now he won't flipping keep quiet, especially to scream out endearing things such as "Mummy's boobs" very loudly. In public. Go to it, SJ!

10:20 PM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

Your closing comment made me laugh...a lot ;)

3:16 AM  
Blogger Cari said...

If your teenager doens't hate you, then you're not being a good parent!

7:59 AM  
Blogger Iamthebookworm said...

Oh you are DEFINITELY NOT the only Scrooge out there. My motto is "Bah Humbug!"

6:55 PM  
Blogger Joke said...

That was sure a heapin' helpin' for having nothing to write about...


10:34 AM  
Blogger Roxanne said...

Good going, SJ! Good going, Carolyn!

My son was a late talker also. And boy did we relish those first times where people outside our family could actually understand him. It is definitely something to celebrate.

Don't even get me started on teenagers. OK, you did. My son just turned down a field trip (which we were willing to pay $300 for) to go to Washington DC. Come on! Who doesn't want to go on a trip like that?

Whatever! (talk to the hand)

8:55 PM  
Blogger The Jackel said...

My daughter tried that crap for awile. I made it a point to let her know her money/freedom depended on cooperation /civility. I got a pretty good result out of the deal

2:38 AM  
Blogger Mary Poppins said...

Oh SJ that is a huge milestone!!!

Bravo to SJ!
But Bravo for mommy for having such great determination!!

11:00 AM  
Blogger Sarah Louise said...

Very cool re: SJ

I have been mainlining chocolate as well

I am not chipper yet about the holidays, although I did change my blog tag to say "a rum pum pum"


2:51 PM  

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