Long Time No See

Circumstances have been conspiring lately to keep me from blogging. I had planned on blogging Tuesday but I had to take my son to see the pediatrician.

She is a wonderful pediatrician. She takes her time with every patient. What this means is that while you get to spend a lot of time with her, you will be there at least an hour for the privilege. It's worth it.

Ten minutes before pre-school he had developed a mysterious black eye. I knew he hadn't fallen. By the time we saw the doctor, it was red and swollen and spreading to his other eye. It was an allergic reaction. I had suspected that but it was still a bit scary.

The doctor prescribed adarax and eye drops. He promptly spit the adarax back at me and there was NO WAY he was letting us put eye drops in. Those two prescriptions were a waste of about thirty bucks.

So I went to the store and got Benadryl and that is what we have been using.

After we purchased the adarax, I found A's old bottle that I hadn't been able to find earlier. This means we have two bottles of this unpalatable crap. I'll wait until it expires to throw it away.

Cause you never know when you'll need to take medicine nobody will touch.
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Roxanne had a suggestion over on Liz's blog that I want to implement.

So I am having a contest. Nobody wins anything but it could be a fun contest anyway.

I need my family named. I am tired of calling them "A" and "J" and, well actually I kind of like "SJ", but that's okay.

So I need a name for "J", the almost seventeen-year old daughter.

I need a name for "A", the eight year old.

I need a name for "SJ" or "S", the four year old.

And I need a name for my hubby "S."

I am going to write all suggestions individually on paper and put them in a hat. So it may be that four different individuals each pick a name.

My only requirement is that it can't be x-rated. Otherwise, the sky's the limit. They don't even have to be real names.

I'll draw the names next Saturday.
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I was driving down the road, minding my own business yesterday, just listening to my alternative rock station when a COUNTRY song came on.

What! If I want to hear country, I'll program my radio to play it or I'll put it in my MP3 player. I certainly don't expect to hear it on a station that plays non-twangy music.

I thought it was a mistake but they played it again twice today. Aaaarrrgghhh!

It turns out it is a Carrie Underwood tune. It's a song about a woman being cheated on so she trashes the guy's car.

While I can appreciate the sentiment, QUIT PLAYING THAT CRAP ON MY ALTERNATIVE STATION!

And besides there's much better LEGAL ways to get back at the two-time cheating scum.

Post his profile on dontdatehimgirl.com. Don't forget to mention his herpes and erectile dysfunction.

Sleep with his brother or father or best friend, hell his grandpa if you have to. Do it as soon as you are broken up while he's still feeling a bit territorial.

If you have a key to his house, sneak in and pee on his toothbrush.

Mail that picture to his Mom that you took of him when he was passed out, the one where you smeared lipstick on his face and dressed him in your undies.

All of this is perfectly satisfying and if you can't resist touching his car, just let the air out of the tires and rub dog poop on the door handles.

Classy!
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The third bird in a year and a half decided to fly into my vehicle this weekend.

Again, I was driving along minding my own business and BAM, into the truck he flew.

There is a bird conspiracy. Depressed birds are deciding to end their lives under my wheels and there's nothing I can do about it.

And with apologies to Dave Barry, isn't Suicide by Caro a great name for a rock band?

I was in the pick-up when I killed it. I checked the grill when I was done running errands. No bird.

The next day it was discovered in the bed. It was mostly headless so it earned the nickname Nearly Headless Nick. (You'd have to read Harry Potter for this reference.)

Blasted birds.