Thursday, April 19, 2007

Long Time No See

Circumstances have been conspiring lately to keep me from blogging. I had planned on blogging Tuesday but I had to take my son to see the pediatrician.

She is a wonderful pediatrician. She takes her time with every patient. What this means is that while you get to spend a lot of time with her, you will be there at least an hour for the privilege. It's worth it.

Ten minutes before pre-school he had developed a mysterious black eye. I knew he hadn't fallen. By the time we saw the doctor, it was red and swollen and spreading to his other eye. It was an allergic reaction. I had suspected that but it was still a bit scary.

The doctor prescribed adarax and eye drops. He promptly spit the adarax back at me and there was NO WAY he was letting us put eye drops in. Those two prescriptions were a waste of about thirty bucks.

So I went to the store and got Benadryl and that is what we have been using.

After we purchased the adarax, I found A's old bottle that I hadn't been able to find earlier. This means we have two bottles of this unpalatable crap. I'll wait until it expires to throw it away.

Cause you never know when you'll need to take medicine nobody will touch.
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Roxanne had a suggestion over on Liz's blog that I want to implement.

So I am having a contest. Nobody wins anything but it could be a fun contest anyway.

I need my family named. I am tired of calling them "A" and "J" and, well actually I kind of like "SJ", but that's okay.

So I need a name for "J", the almost seventeen-year old daughter.

I need a name for "A", the eight year old.

I need a name for "SJ" or "S", the four year old.

And I need a name for my hubby "S."

I am going to write all suggestions individually on paper and put them in a hat. So it may be that four different individuals each pick a name.

My only requirement is that it can't be x-rated. Otherwise, the sky's the limit. They don't even have to be real names.

I'll draw the names next Saturday.
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I was driving down the road, minding my own business yesterday, just listening to my alternative rock station when a COUNTRY song came on.

What! If I want to hear country, I'll program my radio to play it or I'll put it in my MP3 player. I certainly don't expect to hear it on a station that plays non-twangy music.

I thought it was a mistake but they played it again twice today. Aaaarrrgghhh!

It turns out it is a Carrie Underwood tune. It's a song about a woman being cheated on so she trashes the guy's car.

While I can appreciate the sentiment, QUIT PLAYING THAT CRAP ON MY ALTERNATIVE STATION!

And besides there's much better LEGAL ways to get back at the two-time cheating scum.

Post his profile on dontdatehimgirl.com. Don't forget to mention his herpes and erectile dysfunction.

Sleep with his brother or father or best friend, hell his grandpa if you have to. Do it as soon as you are broken up while he's still feeling a bit territorial.

If you have a key to his house, sneak in and pee on his toothbrush.

Mail that picture to his Mom that you took of him when he was passed out, the one where you smeared lipstick on his face and dressed him in your undies.

All of this is perfectly satisfying and if you can't resist touching his car, just let the air out of the tires and rub dog poop on the door handles.

Classy!
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The third bird in a year and a half decided to fly into my vehicle this weekend.

Again, I was driving along minding my own business and BAM, into the truck he flew.

There is a bird conspiracy. Depressed birds are deciding to end their lives under my wheels and there's nothing I can do about it.

And with apologies to Dave Barry, isn't Suicide by Caro a great name for a rock band?

I was in the pick-up when I killed it. I checked the grill when I was done running errands. No bird.

The next day it was discovered in the bed. It was mostly headless so it earned the nickname Nearly Headless Nick. (You'd have to read Harry Potter for this reference.)

Blasted birds.

14 Comments:

Blogger Chris H said...

I like some country music.. oooo does that make me square! Poor birds, sure you don't have birdseed glued to ya grille to just lure the poor buggers in? Evil woman. As for the names, what's wrong with their real names? Or are you so famous someone is gunna twig who you really are? lol

6:28 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

It doesn't make you square. :)

I have MOM jeans so I'm definitely not hip.

My hubby is weird about real names and the only thing I'm famous for is sticking my foot in my mouth. Hee hee.

6:41 PM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

How'd the bird get in your bed??

Dog poop on the door handles, huh? Remind me not to get on your bad side ;)

7:07 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

It was in the bed of the pick-up. I only find horse heads in my bed.

7:09 PM  
Blogger Chelle said...

lol I love that country song you talked about....lol OF course, I love country music...sooooo :)

I used to use my kids real names....and I guess I still do sometimes....notsly refer to them as my daughter, my son...etc. So since I am noat original with names for my own kids....I wont enter the contest..hehe But I am suare that there are so many cool names peopel will come up with. I cant' wait to see what they are!!

Glad to see you back at blogging..I've been kinda MIA, too. Must be the time of year.. :)

7:57 PM  
Blogger velcro said...

I hate hate hate country music with the exception of the Devil came down to Georgia. Every time I got into the car in Saudi the US Forces radio station would start playing country and western grrrrr

2:23 AM  
Blogger paula said...

I have trouble remembering REAL names, you're going to have to keep a list.

Are you speaking from experience with the gettin' back at the guy thing?

7:42 AM  
Anonymous Mad Rabbit said...

I want to enter.
J is diva
A is Ninja ( or as I like to call her my lil ninja)
SJ is Jet cuz he is beautiful and fast and sometimes very loud. (hmmm wonder where that comes from) Poor baby gets it from both sides of the family.
And S Sr is Precious. (if you ever get the kids out of the bed you'll remember why) tee hee
I like all forms of music including country, though lately it is starting to sound like cookie cutter music to me. Guy likes Alabama, but loves the 50's & 60's Motown sound, go figure.

9:29 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

You already know my votes: Astroturf and Jupiter. ;-)

11:36 AM  
Blogger Gingers Mom said...

I actually love that Carrie Underwood song. But I like your suggestions...Lord help anyone who cheats on Carolyn!
I'm gonna have to mull the whole name thing over....I'll be back with suggestions. Are you looking for something funny?

1:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

J-DREAMER
A-CRAZY LEGS (BEST IN THE FAMILY)
SJ-BLUE EYES (MUCH BLUER THAN SINATRAS
S-BRAINIAC

USED TO LOVE COUNTRY MUSIC BUT MOST OF IT ALL SOUNDS THE SAME NOW.

MOM

2:21 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

Chelle - I think everyone is super busy right now. Lots of blogs have been slow.

Velcro - My ears hurt even thinking about it.

Paula - There was no dontdatehimgirl.com back then. Pity. And I'll put the name's list on my profile.

MR - I went to youtube today and played him Sugar Pie Honey Bunch.

Liz - I like Astroturf and Jupiter. Should I throw Saturn in the hat for SJ?

GM - I don't have any requirements on the names. I'm picking them out of a hat so choose what you think would be fun for you to read.

Mom - Dreamer? Don't you mean screamer? LOL

2:40 PM  
Blogger Iamthebookworm said...

That Carrie Underwood song bothers me. She said she carved her name in his leather seat. Well thats vandalism and now he has the proof. Not thinking very hard are we Carrie Underwood? Or am I analyzing this too much?

I don't like country music either.

6:30 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

Bookworm - I thought the same thing. Why would you sign your vandalism?

8:22 AM  

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