Sunday, June 03, 2007

Adventures In Grilling - The Final Frontier

My husband has been the sole griller of the house for as long as we've had a barbecue. We've always had the charcoal grill and I wasn't up to the task of learning to build a fire. Pitiful maybe, but I enjoy turning a knob and getting my fire; not piling up briquettes, lighting them and waiting for them to get to just the right temperature.

However, he received a gas grill for Christmas and I decided to have an impromptu barbecue yesterday. Only he was busy working from home so it was up to me.

I asked him how to fire up the grill and he told me. It sounded pretty simple. Turn on the gas, light the burners, close the lid and let it heat up.

I closed the lid to let it heat up and went in the house to salt the chicken. It didn't take long at all.

When I walked back outside, smoke was billowing from the grill. Huh?

Not only was it twice the temperature he told me it needed to be, there was a bonfire going on. I turned it off but there was still a fire. I learned a few things about grilling.

There is a tray for catching grease. Just like every other piece of equipment a man uses, the grease won't be cleaned out of it. Otherwise, it wouldn't be manly now, would it? Clean the tray before heating the grill.

Chicken can be burned to a crisp on the outside and raw in the middle. This is the result of grease fires that continue to erupt from below while the meat is grilling.

If you ask the kid to go into the house and get you a knife, specify a steak knife. Else you will get a butter knife.

Dogs that have not wanted to leave the house and go outside all day will be pawing the back door to get outside and stand in the way.

If you are doing the side dishes at the same time and they are cooking in the house, something besides the meat may also be overcooked.

That said, I am intrigued and may have to try this again, but first I'll clean out that grease tray.


Blogger Bearette24 said...


Grilling scares me, though I like the results. Maybe someday I'll try the little George Foreman one.

9:56 PM  
Blogger Roxanne said...

I love our gas grill. It rocks!(pun intended)

Hopefully next time will be more successful.

6:16 AM  
Blogger Caro said...

Bearette - I was thinking that next time, when it's planned, of marinating tofu in teriyaki and making shish kebobs with tofu, mushrooms and cherry tomatoes. Yum.

Roxanne - I hope next time will be better too. I hate when I suck hard at something and can't get better.

6:37 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

I'm always afraid I'll blow up the deck if I touch the grill. It's the propane tank that scares me.

6:52 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

You know- I wonder if that fear goes back to a time in college when I worked at a plant nursery as one of my summer jobs. They filled propane tanks out back for $20. None of the women were allowed to do it, only the boys, even though I was a good five or six years older than some of them.

Sexism strikes again...

6:57 AM  
Blogger MsCellania said...

I am the griller in this abode.
In fact, I am Everything in this Abode. Dh works 70 hours a week, at a minimum.
Ack, I'm getting depressed.
What kind of grill do you have? You need to have a 'courting period' where you learn all about the fellow - where the hot spots are, how to clean it, etc. I generally turn the thing on HIGH and set the timer for 5 minutes after removing the food. That way, FIRE cleans that sucker. But you have to turn on a timer, or you will leave it on for Days, Days I'm telling you!
I have never had to empty a grease tray. But we have 3 sets of burners and that may burn off everything. I've had a few good fires in my day (ribs or other fatty stuff) but I generally turn the fire off the middle section, and leave the 2 outer ones on for indirect heat. I generally leave the lid down and sort of bake everything.
Well, this is a whole lot of worthless information, actually...

7:31 AM  
Blogger paula said...


I can't let my husband near the grill because he wants to turn things over every two seconds and won't turn the heat up high enough.

7:39 AM  
Blogger Mary Poppins said...

Well I got to hand it to're brave enough to try again...

I'm not grill gal...although I do love the George Foreman one...maybe you should start off small..

baby steps steps..

11:53 AM  
Blogger Chris H said...

I must have done something right in training me man... he always cleans out the grease ! Woo hoo for a useful man. Bugger about the chicken!

5:56 PM  
Blogger Ms.L said...

I'm impressed that you
didn't burn off your eyebrows!
That's what I usually do;)

5:15 PM  
Blogger Gingers Mom said...

I love how men bbq and come in "exhasuted" from making dinner. While the women are inside preparing everything BUT the meat. And then we have to clean up. No bitterness here.

I don't bbq. I always ruin it too. Hope your eyebrows are still intact.

9:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wonderful story. Great Wit! Won't mention the burned up stuff produced by you know who.


8:53 AM  

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